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1950 - 2023

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David passed away on October 18, 2023 after courageously dealing with Pancreatic Cancer, 1st diagnosed August 4, 2020.  Born July 24, 1950 in Pittsburgh, PA, David had BS & MS degrees in Electrical Engineering.  He worked for Eastman Kodak Company, in Rochester, NY for 37 years.  David also owned & managed Rental property for 35 years, especially with the help of the Rhow family.  David is predeceased by his parents, Lawren E. & Isabelle E. Gardner (the last of their 2 & 7 respective siblings), his 1st partner of 17 years, Richard L. Pearlman (Rochester’s Eastman School of Music Opera Director, then Chicago’s Lyric Opera Director), and then his spouse of 22 years, Tim O. Mains (50-year Educator and 20-year Rochester City Council member who David married in Canada in 2006 when NY agreed to recognize all valid same gender marriages despite not being able to license them in NY at that time).  David is also predeceased by Mains family sister-in-law, Laura Canavesi.

David is survived by his brothers Chet J. Gardner (wife Henrie), Lawren E. Gardner, Jr. (wife Katherine, aka Kitty), & Don E. Gardner.

David is also survived by in-laws of the Mains family, Steve Mains (wife Cindy Savage), Roxie McNelly (husband James).  David is also survived by several Nephews & Nieces, as well as great-nephews & great-nieces.

David had a positive attitude and faced Chemotherapy, Radiation and Surgeries with strength.  He loved swimming and continued lap swims whenever not connected to Chemo or recovering from surgeries.  NY friends from Rochester, then Jamestown & Pine Bush (where his spouse, Tim, was Superintendent of the later two’s respective School Districts) were his support system & endured his sense of humor whether directly or via his texting cartoons to them, as well as updates on his life.  He did not subscribe to any social media but direct messaged those he knew.  He was especially grateful for all the support and insightful medical advice he got from his good friends Carl and Cindy Devore during the last few years. He also often said how lucky he was to have his close friends, Gretchen and Fritz Meier in Middletown. Whether it was going out to dinner, a show, ice cream, just sitting around or having them make all the unfortunate runs to the emergency room. They were always there for him.  The list of those supporting him is too long to even try to list here, but they are well aware of their connection to him.

David chose to be cremated and will be buried beside his husband Tim at Mt. Hope Cemetery.

Family and friends are invited to call on FRIDAY, April 12, from 4-8PM at Miller Funeral and Cremation Services (3325 Winton Rd. South, Rochester, NY 14623). David’s Funeral Service will be held SATURDAY, April 13, at 10AM in the funeral home’s chapel. For those unable to attend CLICK HERE for the livestream of David’s service. Burial will be at  Mt. Hope Cemetery, 1133 Mt. Hope Ave., Rochester, NY 14620.

In lieu of flowers, consider donating to one of David’s favorite charities:

https://giving.chq.org/chq-fund/  (The Chautauqua Institute, Chautauqua, NY, specify for the Opera)

Tim O Mains Scholarship, Pine Bush Central School District P.O. Box 700, Pine Bush, NY  12566 Attn: Scholarship Coordinator

https://www.blackfriars.org/  (Blackfriars Theater, Rochester, NY)

https://rochesterrainbowunion.com/ (formerly The Gay Alliance of the Genesee Valley)

https://petsalive.org/  Pets Alive, Middletown, NY

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